Sunny and lost

Once again from Henri Nouwen -

Writing to Save the Day
Writing can be a true spiritual discipline. Writing can help us to concentrate, to get in touch with the deeper stirrings of our hearts, to clarify our minds, to process confusing emotions, to reflect on our experiences, to give artistic expression to what we are living, and to store significant events in our memories. Writing can also be good for others who might read what we write.Quite often a difficult, painful, or frustrating day can be "redeemed" by writing about it. By writing we can claim what we have lived and thus integrate it more fully into our journeys. Then writing can become lifesaving for us and sometimes for others too.

Thought this was very appropriate for a blog.

This weekend has been beautiful - spring seems to have arrived in all her glory and everywhere you go smiling people with very little clothes on clong to one another or laugh with friends. Despite all this warmth and beauty, I am feeling homeless. The germans have a phrase 'angekommen zu sein' it means to have arrived. When you go on a long trip, or move to a new home or city people will ask you after a few days, week, or a month if you have 'arrived.'

I love the deep understanding reflected in this question - that to arrive with your body, with your suitcases and your boxes is not the same thing as to really 'arrive' someplace - to make that place your own, to feel like you belong there.

I have been struggling with this exact issue this week, with this new change of schools has come an unexpected sence of general insecurity - I no longer feel 'angekommen' (arrived), I have lost my sence of footing and belonging. I feel like a little spider flying around in the wind on her one lone thread. I am missing my web and unsure how to build it.

I guess this is what God and I will be talkign about this week.

So, having written about this feeling and fear - I am now hoping that like the wise Nouwen said I am on my way to empotional and spiritual clarity.